Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Strawberry Letter 23 - Subject: Not Enough Time

Dear Steve&Shirley I am a 29yr old female that is very independent I have two jobs & go to school full time with no kids. But thats not the problem the problem is that I have a boyfriend that I have been dating for 9 months and he says that we dont spend enough time together. At first when I wanted to spend time with him he was to busy working on his projects & would tell me to fall back so he could finish & we would have time when he was done. So i got the two jobs & school to occupy my time so that I wouldnt bother him. Now that my plate is a little full its a problem that we dont have that spending time together, so he want me to quit one of my jobs so the time would be there. The main thing that is bothering me now is that he think that I dont want to sacrifies things for him so he always will make the statement if you cant do this for me then "I will find someone else that dont have to much on their plate to focus just on me." I do love him but I am confused because we spend time when i am off but thats not good enough for him. What can I do to show him that I want just as much time with him as he does with out stopping the things that I am doing? Signed Busy Female

My response:

Never sacrafice your income & your education for any man. If he is a great guy, he'd support your desire to better yourself. You come first before any man. You can't take care of a man unless you can take care of yourself.

You can always find time to spend with him. I'm guessing the time you can give him he doesn't want. That is his problem, not yours. It may be conflicting with another girl. If he's giving you an ultimatum on time, tell him to back off. If he don't like it, tell him to hit the road.

No man will give you that type of ultimatum if he loved you. He just want you to fall in line so he can have his cake. Send him packing.  

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Strawberry Letter 23 - Subject: Should I leave or let him continue to be my "sponsor"?

Dear Morning Show Crew: Hi I am a 24 year old african american young lady who is dating an 30 year old white male. We have been dating for a little over a year and he still does not love me. He says that he really cares for me and doesnt know if he could ever love me because of what his ex-wife did to him. But its been over five years since they have split and I think that its time for him to move on and past that. He says that he doesnt love me and doesnt know if he can have a future with me but says he really cares for me and doesnt want me to leave him because Im the good woman that he needs in his life. He also wants me to have his children (which he would want full custody of) and says that we would be great parents even if we are not together. I mean he is a really nice person and takes care of me and provides for me like a man should but he is also a lira and a cheater. So should I just pack up and go or just stay and let him continue to be my "sponsor" and continue to take care of me until I can save enough money to stand on my own two feet? I mean will it seem like Im using him? Would I be wrong for doing that? I need some advice PLEASE HELP! Thank You, Young & Confused

My response (It's a bit scattered but I'll get better at it):

First of all, this man is not your boyfriend. Nor is he a person who loves you. Why are you wasting your time? He is getting what he wants from you without any attachments or any responsibility. He takes care of you like a man should? No he's not. He is just paying for the sex you offer him. If he was taking care of you like he should be, he would be making plans to be with you, i.e.  proposing to you & working on the way to getting married.

He wants you have his children without you having full custody? He just wants to control you. Why are you even still with him? You even say he is a liar. Why are you not packing your bags? What kind of relationship do you have without trust? He says there is no future because he does not love you and he probably has multiple other women in your same predicament.

Your letter is screaming with alarms that make me think that your self esteem is so low or nearly non-existent. Yes you are young. So you have a lot of time to find the right man for you. Move on little lady & learn to love yourself. Without loving yourself you do not know what it is for a man to love you.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

JH Meets Mom

My mom finally came up to visit from Florida. She is stayec with us for 3 weeks. I was a bit nervous for this visit. She was very against JH living with me. It was not to do with JH at all but her beliefs. She doesn't believe in men and women living together if they are not married.

When she arrived, JH and I went to pick her up at the airport. This was their first meeting. He helped her with her bags and got her into the car. It was a very pleasant ride back home.

She got to spend a lot of time with him. He even received the "what are your intentions" talk from her. Hell he even got that from my bro and my father.

Since we were going to spend Thanksgiving as a family, we decided to cook. We had gingerbeer, pineapple drink, ham, chicken, curried goat, asparagus, spinach, sweet potato, mac & cheese, rice & peas and pumpkin cheesecake for dessert. It was good food. We all ate until we had the itis.

I really enjoyed the time with my mom. We didn't bicker like we usually do. She did tell me she really likes JH. Normally this would make me not like JH. This time is different. JH has gotten under my skin.

My mom left after 3 weeks and she invited JH down for Christmas. However, I'm the only person heading down. He and my bro has to work. The situation sucks because I wanted to spend Christmas with all of my family. My mom left happy. She coud tell JH is a great guy.

Side Note: My sister finally met JH. She likes him. She asked me if I'm having a big wedding or so because Camille is dying to be in a wedding. I told her I'm having a destination wedding. Nothing big. However, the conversation is premature because JH hasn't even proposed.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Halloween Weekend & Some

Halloween weekend my cousin Kevin decided to get married in Miami. This would be JH's and myself's first trip as a couple. We left together on Friday evening and were to return Sunday evening.

We were able to fly, rent a car and get a hotel rather cheap. The car we got for a standard was really nice and was considered the next class up. It was really nice. We found out we were staying, in party town, Miami Beach.

The wedding was Saturday, in middle of the day! No time to really enjoy Miami Beach that night. The wedding was a mini family reunion. There were 4 cousins missing. All my dad's sisters were there. JH got to meet the whole side of my dad's in one day. My dad went around introducing him as my fiance, lol. My family seemed to take to him well too. No big surprises.

It was really nice seeing my dad and his sister's together. I made sure to take couple pictures. I had a good time regardless.

Sunday we had enough time to tour around Miami Beach before we had to leave. We wanted to hit the beach but we had an early check out. So we just took off our shoes, rolled up our pants and walked along the water's edge. It was pretty romantic. We then walked around the little town. I got to see Miami Ink tattoo parlor. It was the busiest parlor on Washington Ave and there was probably 20 parlors there, lol. See what TLC can do for your business. Before we left Miami, JH wanted to try out Five Guys. So we both had our fill. We then headed to airport.

We returned home feeling good. It was a nice mini- vacation.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Life with JH - 3 Weeks Worth

I have missed writing fir 3 weeks. JH and I have a rhythm. It is now almost a completely normal thing.

We went to the New York Comic Con on Saturday Oct 9th. He enjoyed hinself. We didn't bother on Sunday because the line up was not so interesting. We missed Friday, but we had to. It was my brother's birthday.

So on my brother's birthday we took him to Slate and played pool and we had sushi for dinner. He had a good time I believe.

Within these 3 weeks JH and I saw the movie The Social Network. It was a pretty good movie even though I wanted to see Let Me In.

We try to do a lot of little things together. It may not be some big fancy outtings but the little things are so much more sentimental.

I am debating on continuing this series or not. I don't feel I have enough material to keep it going on a weekly basis. I may just do a post when something interesting or special happens. I can barely keep up with myself.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Best Friend -> Lover

I never thought that I would find a great guy in this late at life. I'm not old but I'm past my prime (bka the 20s). So my friend, JH, has turned into my boyfriend. He now lives with me. It is funny how things turn out. I could not picture us together. He is such a nice guy. I just never thought of him in any other way.

I was looking for a best friend. He was satisfying that need for me. We went on vacation together and somehow cupid changed things. My father and I picked him up at the airport. I saw him sitting there waiting for me. I still saw nothing more than friendship.

That first night, nothing much really changed. The next day we went to the Vegas strip and we walked around. He was first to hold on to me. He did it so sweetly. That night he stayed in my bed. What started off innocent ended up a bit naughty. He stayed in my bed the rest of the time in vegas, unbeknownst to my dad.

In New Mexico, we shared his bedroom. It was nice. I enjoyed my time there. Our closeness was apparent by then. I still didn't know where all this was leading. When I had to leave, I didn't want to leave him behind. I have never really felt like that so quickly. He felt the same too.

The biggest thing that I love is that he's affectionate. I am a big lover of that. We get along great. He's not bossy or controling. He does what he needs to do. He's quite frankly a man. He may be a bit down and out right now but he is not lazy.

I don't know how this happened; him living with me. It's totally out of my character. I had to tell my parents and friends. This was an utter shock to some and some were happy for me. My parents took it pretty well. I was shocked that my mother took the news very well compared to what I imagined. She's not 100% on board but she is respecting my decision.

Since he's moved in, I've felt a bit satisfied in a lot of areas. I actually find myself eager to get home after work. I get lots of love when I walk thru the door. I get a different type of companionship than that with my brother. He actually satisfies me sexually. I guess the emotion mixed with it makes it so much better. It's like I can't get enough him.

I found a great guy. He's intelligent. He is educated. He comes from a full home. His parents are still together. He knows how to take care of a house and be with a woman. He's very well rounded.

The plan is to eventually marry. Not looking to do that so soon. Maybe after he proposes. But we have agreed that if by any chance I get pregnant before then, we will be married before the child is born. I do not plan on raising a child by myself. He feels the same. Hopefully in the future, he will fulfill both of our dreams together. I'm looking forward to that.

The funny thing about all of this? I never thought about getting married. Never really cared one way or another about it. JH comes into my life and I'm thinking about it. So much unlike myself. If you knew me a year earlier, you would never picture this for me. I am happy though.

His parents are great. I communicate with his mother on Facebook or email. I like her. She told me when she saw us in the airport walking towards them, that he was glowing and he hasn't glowed like that in a really long time. When he told them that he was going to move in with me, they said they pretty much knew he would.

My dad said that we got along like an old couple. People around Vegas thought we were married. My dad was happy that I found a guy that makes me happy. He also loves him too. However, he'd kill JH if he did something to me. So there you have it, his love is conditional. Every now and then my dad calls and asks how are my 2 sons. That makes me smile.

I'm glad those around me are embracing JH. My brother took to him too. Well he always takes to all of my friends. However, they both became workout partners. I hope JH feels like he's included in my life. He tries to make me feel included in his.

Only problem I am having is concentrating on other things in my life that I need to. He distracts me sometimes. He's very good at that. Eventually the newness will wear off and I'll get back to my typical normal routine. I'm glad I am able to have my best friend as my boyfriend too. It makes for a lovely relationship.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Life w/ JH Week Ending 9/26/10

This week was another major milestone for us. I was infected by my employee and brought a cold home to me and JH. We were both sick together. It's been over a month and we get sick. It wasn't as bad as it could be.

JH is a very tolerable sick man. He's not whiny at all. That was refreshing. Hopefully we won't be sick again for another 3 years or so.

I was symptomatic first. That first night I ended up sleeping in my mom's room because I didn't want to wake him up constantly. The next morning he lectured me after asking my brother where I disappeared to. He said I should've stayed in our bed. That was funny. Then when he was symptomatic he did the same, lol. I found him at 5 am curled up in the hallway when I had to use the bathroom. So I got him up and had him come back into the bedroom. Later in he morning he asked me how he got back into the bedroom, lol.

This week was also my birthday week. He decided to make my birthday special by doing little things throughout the week. He got me a balloon, a $25 iTunes gift card, surprised me at work and took me to eat at one of my favorite restaurants. We also found a way to get some more bubble tea. Our favorite past time.

He also made his first trip to NJ on his own too. I was worried until he got home safe. He is definitely learning to get around well. I'm happy he is. I can't wait until he meets new people and starts to hang out with them too. I know I can't keep him all to myself all the time. But I know he's coming home to me.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Life w/ JH Week Ending 9/19/10

This week went well. My life is adjusted to living with JH. We had a few mishaps at night this week. I have kicked him in my sleep. He has punched me in his sleep. Not hard though. No bruising, thank goodness. It'll be hard to explain that one without him getting death threats if there was a bruise, lol.

On Friday, I started my new exercise regine. I am walking around cemetery. So it was my first night. Hopefully I can stick to this. JH is my walking partner. My brother also joined us. It was fun walking with both of them. I love talking to both of them. Right now, both of them are my world.

Saturday I promised to take JH to the Nintendo store. He's been talking about going for over a week. So I showed him more than just the store. I took him to Rockefeller Center, Apple Store, Radio City Music Hall. I also showed him Bryant Park and a Japanese store called Kinokuniya. We worked up an appetite so we went to Chevy's in Time Square, which is only a couple of blocks away. On our way there, we passed the Pop-Tart restaurant he had told me about. That is just too crazy. Just looking at the restaurant made my teeth ache.

We ate a pretty good meal at Chevy's. We packed our dinner to go and we had desert. He had a brownie sundae and I had the flan. The portion sizes were ridiculous. I barely finished mine and JH cleaned his plate then mine. I then had an idea to pick up some bubble tea for later. So we went to China Town for some before we headed home.

Sunday, I needed to concentrate on getting my taxes done. So JH was giving me some space when I got a rare invite from my friend Crystal. She invited us to Governor's Island. It was a good time.
Photobucket Pictures, Images and Photos
Afterwards we stopped at Canal Street for some bubble tea with them. I ended up getting a bubble juice instead. JH tried the coconut bubble tea. I figured my brother deserved one too.

So after we parted ways with Crystal and her boyfriend, Ricardo, we went to my normal bubble tea spot. I ended up buying 6 teas and cream cake. I wanted the bubble tea for the next day. JH swears I'm addicted. He shouldn't talk because he goes thru hi-chews like no tomorrow. So as you can tell, my tax work was axed for the day; but I had fun.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Life with JH Week Ending 9/12/10

This week with JH was not very exciting. But we did hit a huge milestone in our relationship. I feel it was huge but he was excited about it. I wasn't too excited.

This week I had to take out my braids. No one except immediate family, with an exception for Crystal and June, have seen me take out my braids. I feel the most unattractive. My hair looks awful, dirty and nappy. I find it repulsive. JH found this to be so much fun. He was looking forward to seeing the natural me.

It takes me a week to take them out. I start on Monday and finish by Friday. On Saturday I get my hair permed. Thru the week he stuck close to me. I even let him feel my hair. Might as well let him get very familiar with my natural hair.

By time I was done, he still looked at me with adoring eyes. I felt so much better then. This man is a definite keeper. He has accepted me as I am. Nappy hair and all.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Life w/ JH Week Ending 9/5/10

It's now 2 full weeks that JH has been living with. One thing for sure is that he's keeping me busy and active. This week we didn't do much sightseeing. Most of the week was a blur. Couple of days really stand out to me.

Wednesday, JH had to come to the city to job hunt. So we ended up meeting up to have lunch together. We ended up eating Qdoba and sitting outside by the park. That was so nice. Wish he could work near me so we can do this often.

Thursday was the big day. It was time for him to meet my Godmother. So he met me by my job so we could go there together. My godmother took to him. We ate dinner at her favorite restaurant "Bella Luna." After dinner we took a walk in Central Park. I took some pictures of the two of them. They looked cute.
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My godmother also gave him some information on volunteer jobs.

Friday I dragged him with me to the laundrymat do we could wash the last 2 comforters I needed to wash. Afterwards I took him to Kings Plaza. He seemed to like the mall. It's nothing like the malls in the West, that's for sure. It's a mall none the less.

Saturday we had to get ready for our party that evening by getting some groceries. First we stopped at a diner for breakfast. He orders the most ridiculous meal. It was an ice cream sundae ontop of a belgium waffle!!!! OMG that was ridiculous!!
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Later, we have the party. The most important people showed up. Ericka (late as usual), Shauna, Crystal and her boyfriend Ricardo. We had a good time talking, eating and watching tv. They all liked him. Ericka cracked me up when she walked by him and said, "my gosh you're tall." I'm glad they took to him. He really is a great guy.

I am starting to feel that this arrangement is going to work for the long haul. I still marvel at him when it comes down sharing my space. I can't believe I'm actually living with my boyfriend. It feels really good coming home to someone who cares and spoils me.
Let's start a new week.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Life with JH Week Ending 8/29/10

So I decided to start keeping a diary of my new life with JH. He has moved in with me on 8/23/10.

Monday he arrives with his father. He said he didn't have a lot of stuff. He LIED!!! He had a shit ton of stuff. 2 crates and a huge box of DVDs alone! He had this huge weight bench that his father had to take back with him. He had a lot of other dodads. We try to put up as much as possible. Went to bed tired as hell.

Tuesday morning I had a half day. I was trying to show him how to get around. He ended up leaving with me to work. He wanted to walk around NYC while I was at work. He ended up walking all the way to Central Park and back. He met me at my job so we can go home.

Wednesday, I remember coming home and he had cooked dinner. He cooked steak and corn. It was pretty good. The steak was a bit salty but it had nice flavoring. After dinner we decided to put up the DVDs. My cabinet now has 3 shelves dedicated to Anime and 2 to regular movies.

Thursday is a blur. I don't remember anything out of the ordinary happening.

Friday I had him meet me at work. I took him to Times Square and Union Square. We had dinner in Time Square and we also picked up our weekend passes for the New York Comic Con in October. By time we got home I was exhausted.

Saturday I took him to Borough Hall so he could take his police test. I did my taxes while I waited for him. When he was done, we walked across the Brooklyn Bridge and then took him to China Town. We got Bubble Tea. I got a very good looking iPhone case. We left so I could go do my taxes.
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Sunday we went to the beach in Long Beach, Long Island. We had a good time. We took the train instead of driving. We tried this burger joint called Five Guys and it was the shiznit!! By time we got home it was after 7 and we had enough time to clean up and watch True Blood.
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All in all, living wih JH so far is fun. He really hasn't encroached on my space. I'm still getting used to it. He's been very tender and gentle with me. I sometimes think to myself when will this fall apart. I can't believe I stumbled upon such a great guy. I must've done something right somewhere.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Rants and Ramblings: What's Been On My Mind

1. Teens and Adults : Leniency After Committing a Crime?
I'm tired of hearing that the courts should be lenient to those who commits a crime. I don't care if it's their 1st or 10th time. If you commit the crime you should do the time. You knew doing the act it was illegal. You had a choice whether to follow thru or not. You chose to follow thru so prepare to take the consequences.

2. Hood Rat Looking Men/Boys
If you want to continue to wear your pants hanging off your ass and looking like an ignorant fool, don't get pissed when the rest of us in society don't acknowledge you as a productive part of society. I'm all for self expression as the next person. How is it self expression when more than one of you are doing it? If a guy dressed as stated came in for an interview I would not even bother interviewing him. He is not what I would to represent my company. You look like a thug, a criminal and not worth my respect. So therefore, I will not acknowledge you. You can be a sweet guy, but your outer wear I see first. First impressions stick!!!

3. Excessive Tattoos
Yes tattoos are cool and hot. Everyone wants them. Hell, I even have one. It's not hidden but it's not very noticable. Just the way they should be. I know the history of tattoos. I also know that our youth are so into getting so many tattoos in the most awful places: necks, hands, faces. They don't think about their future. Not everyone can become rappers. Where else would hire you? Companies are not going to want you to represent them. Put the tattoos where they can be hidden at work and during an interview. No matter how popular tattoos are they still have a negative conotation in corporate America. Would want to go to a bank and the teller looks like sn ex-con? Would you want your doctor to look like that? All the people on TV with all the tattoos do not work for corporate America. But they pretty much had to own their business in order to get paid. And most of them didn't have all the tattoos when they started. They only did when their business was viable and self-sustaining. They knew they wouldn't get financing/backing if they looked like an ex-con. Banks/Venture Capitalists will not take you seriously even if you present a winning proposal in front of them. They will not get past your looks. So please keep the tattoos away from the face, neck and hands. You will be doing yourself a big favor.

4. Where have manners and courtesy gone?
Has everyone gone rude? Why aren't parents teaching their children manners and common courtesy? As a kid I was taught you must respect your elders. Kids nowadays do not. They will disrespect their own parents as well as their teachers and any adult they encounter. And the adults are just as bad.
That's all for now. I have more but they are not as high profile as the above 4. Stay tuned. You get more or maybe not. It was just good to get these off of my chest.

Monday, August 16, 2010

5 minute management lessons

Lesson 1:  
      A priest offered a Nun a lift.
      She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg..
      The priest nearly had an accident.
      After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.
      The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'
      The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
      The nun once again said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?' 
      The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.'
      Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.
      On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, 'Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.' 
      Moral of the story:
      If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Lesson 2:      
       A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.   
      They rub it and a Genie comes out.
      The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.' 

      'Me first! Me first!' says the administration clerk 'I want to be in the Bahamas , driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.'  
      Puff! She's gone. 
      'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply       

      of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.' 
      Puff! He's gone. 
     'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch' 
      Moral of the story:
      Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson 3:
      An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
      A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?'

      The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.' 
      So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. 
      Moral of the story: 
      To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up..
Lesson 4 
      A turkey was chatting with a bull. 
      'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.' 'Well, why don't you nibble on
     some of my droppings?' replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients..'

      The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. 
      The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.                      

      Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
      He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
      Moral of the story:  
      Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there...

Lesson 5    
      A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. 
      While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. 
      As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. 

     The dung was actually thawing him out!
      He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
     A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
     Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. 
      Morals of the story:
      (1) Not everyone who shits  on you is your enemy. 
      (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. 
      (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!


Catholic Schools Work

Little Zachary was doing very badly in math. His parents had tried everything... Tutors, Mentors, flash cards, Special learning centers.
  In short, everything they could think of to help his math.
Finally, in a last ditch effort, they took Zachary down and enrolled him  in the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Zachary came home with a very serious look on his face. He didn't even kiss his mother Hello.   Instead, he went straight to his room and started studying. Books and papers were spread out all over the room and little Zachary was hard at work. His mother was amazed. She called him down to dinner.

 To her shock, the minute he was done, he marched back to his room without a word, and in no time, he was back hitting the books as hard as before. This went on for some time, day after day, while the mother
tried to understand what made all the difference.

 Finally, little Zachary brought home his report card. He quietly laid it on the table, went up to his room and hit the books.
With great trepidation, his Mom looked at it and to her great surprise, little Zachary got an "A" in math. She could no longer hold her curiosity.

 She went to his room and said, "Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?"
 Little Zachary looked at her and shook his head, no. "Well, then," she replied, "Was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms? WHAT WAS IT?"

Little Zachary looked at her and said, "Well, on the first day of school
  when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around."

The Moral of Auntie Sharon

A teacher gave her class of 11 year olds an assignment: To get their parent to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.
The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

Ashley said, 'My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs got broken.'

'What's the morale of that story?' asked the teacher.

'Don't put all your eggs in one basket!'

'Very good,' said the teacher.

Next little Sarah raised her hand and said, 'Our family are farmers too. But we raise chickens for the meat market. One day we had a dozen eggs, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral to this story is, 'Don't count your chickens before they're hatched'.'

'That was a fine story Sarah.'

Michael, do you have a story to share?'

'Yes. My daddy told me this story about my Aunty Sharon. Aunty Sharon was a flight engineer on a plane in the Gulf War and her plane got hit.

She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whisky, a machine gun and a machete.

She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't break and then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops.

She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she
ran out of bullets.
Then she killed twenty more with the machete until the blade broke.
And then she killed the last ten with her bare hands.'

'Good heavens,' said the horrified teacher, 'what kind of moral did your daddy tell you from that horrible story?'

'Stay the f**k away from Aunty Sharon when she's been drinking.'

When U Black, U Black

When I was born, I was BLACK ,
When I grew up, I was 
When I went in the sun, I 
stayed BLACK,
When I got cold, I was 
When I was scared, I was 
When I was sick, I was 
And when I die, I'll still be 
NOW, You 'white' folks...

When you're born, you're 
When you grow-up, you're 
When you go in the sun, you get 
When you're cold, you turn 
When you're scared, you're 
When you get sick, you're 
When you bruise, you turn 
And when you die, you look 

So who y'all be callin' COLORED Folks?

The Why's of Men

 (because they are plugged into a genius)

(they don't have enough time) 

(they don't stop to ask directions) 
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock)
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties) 


(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy) 

(don't know......it never happened) 

(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn) 
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweat-shirt seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'   'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'   He yelled back, ' University of Oklahoma .'   And they say blonde's are dumb...   
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, 'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.'

The woman replies, 'I'll miss you....' 

'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?   
A: A rumor 
 ------- ---------------------------------------

Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat this SOB to death.  AMEN 

Q: Why do little boys whine? 
A: They are practicing to be men.

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough. 

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?   
A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual..'

Friday, August 6, 2010

New Vegas Mex

So I finally went on my vacation that I was planning for a long while. I definitely needed it. I also got to spend time with people I care about.

First stop.... Las Vegas. Originally planned because my dad was to have eye surgery done. So I planned on having to shuttle him around. However, my friend from New Mexico came too. This was the 1st time I had a "male" friend stay with my dad and myself. My dad took to him really well. He liked him a lot. I did too of course. My dad finally let me use the car. This was after months of coercision. I took my friend to the strip for 3 days. He got his fill of what the strip was about. He was amused by the porn cards being distributed as you walked down the strip. It was good times.

Next stop..... Socorro. Originally planned to spend time with my best friend from college. However, since I didn't get a response I just spent my time with him and his family. They let me stay with them. I loved his parents. They were very inviting and sweet. His mom greeted me with a hug when I first met her at the airport. They are both adorable. They are bird people which is pretty amazing. I was given a personal tour of Socorro. I was hoping I would see my college friend in my travels but no such luck. It did have me worried though. I like Socorro. I can see myself living there.

Last stop.... Albuquerque. My last leg of my vacation. My friend came with me here too. We stayed at a local hotel. He also gave me a personal tour. He had taken me to couple of really nice restaurants. One was a Japanese Hibachi Steakhouse. The other was this romantic restaurant ontop of the Sardia mountains. We had to take a tram to get there. We were supposed to go his friend's party too but he remembered I was allergic to cats. So we didn't go. Wanted him to tho since this would be the last time seeing his friends before moving to New York. Instead he stayed with me to spoil me rotten. Good times.

It was time for my vacation to end. I was not very happy about it. It felt very weird leaving. I felt as much at home in NV and NM. I even shed some tears going thru security. I didn't want to go home. Wonder what would've happened if I stayed.

Sent by Quickoffice - http://www.quickoffice.com

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Nightmare on Long Beach

So I went to the beach Saturday. It would have been a great time except for 2 things in sequence. I was planning on having a relaxing time. Just wanted to lay out and tan and get into some water to cool off. So it was me, my brother and my friend Shauna. Shauna wanted to drive and she came and picked us up.

There was the the 1st exception sitting in the vehicle. She brought her soon to be step daughter with her. I was not very happy because I really didn't want to deal with any kids. I just wanted to relax. When we get to beach and set up our spot, as I am going to lay down, the little girl starts throwing sand. See that's why I didn't want any kids with me. Especially bad ones. She wouldn't listen and was a bit hyper. So much for relaxing at the beach.

After a while Shauna was able to keep her somewhat contained. So I took the opportunity to try to chill. I layed down with my towel over my face. I wasn't trying to get a tan on my face. It is he darkest part on my body lol since it's usually the most directly open to the sun. Why did this little girl go and snatch the towel off of my face? I so wanted to spank her. So I decided to go and try out the water. The water was cold but managable. I went back to my mat. Shauna and the child was not there. So I layed down for a while comfortably.

Later when they showed up I was in a much better mood now that I was able to chill. My brother was knocked out all this time. He's good. I wish I had his resolve. He came layed down and that was it. So I started to pal around with the kid and Shauna. We went to get water for her sand castle. Then she wanted to play in the water so we walked to area we were allowed to go into. The girl screeched, stripped Shauna and started to cry. Once I got out of the water she was better. So we started to walk back to our mat. This is when exception #2 happened. Shauna and I looked away one second and the child was gone!!!! We went back to mat hoping she was there. I woke my broher to stay alert if she came back to the mat. Shauna and I went opposite directions to look for her and notifying lifeguards.

This is by far the most scariest situation I've been in. I looked at everyone like they were a predator. Everyone's a predator when a child is missing. I was looking in people's tents and was tempted to open people's coolers that looked big enough to hold the girl. Shauna and I met up as we searched and we combed the beach. We switched directions. All the while, I'm scared and developing a stress tummy. After a good while searching a life guard caught me and said they found her. She was 2 beaches over. Shauna went and got her.

Thank goodness. Once she came back, Shauna said the little girl didn't know she was lost. She was looking for her Chinese friend she was playing with earlier. The family had left home earlier. I swear, I never went thru so much in 30 mins. It felt like it was forever!!! I'm so glad she was safe. We all didn't feel like staying at the beach after that. So we left to go home.

So much for a relaxing Sunday at the beach.

Monday, July 5, 2010

What Makes 100%?

What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:


is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.


8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%


11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But ,

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%


2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, its the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top. 

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Children For Thought

The other day, after a discussion about my friend's children and their mother, my friend asks me what would I want if I had a child. I've been asked this question numerous times before. But the question first
should be, do I want any?

I have been pregnant before, but I don't have a child. I have thought if I wanted child every now and then. Depending on my situation at that point of time, my answers varied. To everyone else, I've always
gave the excuse, "I want to see what my cousins dish out before I have any." I said that because twins run in my family and I didn't want to have twins.

So back to my friend's question. What do I want for a child? I've always wanted a boy. I do not have a name lined out. However, my family creates a lot of girls, so I'm pretty sure I would have a girl. So I've 2 names already for a girl. The first name I picked out, my cousin stole. And my second name I picked out, my same cousin stole for her second child. I am keeping my second name anyhow because it means something special to me.

My friend thinks I should have a little girl. I wouldn't know what to do with a little girl. I am not girly. I hate doing my hair and other frivolous stuff like getting nails done, etc. The girliest vices I claim to have are pocketbooks and panties. I absolutely hate dressing up. I will complain for the whole time getting dressed, lol. I'm most comfortable in jeans and a top. How will I be able to teach a little girl all about the girly stuff I don't know? He said I shouldn't worry about that because I'd learn while I try to teach a daughter.

Now, having a little boy wouldn't be too much trouble. Hair, no problem; send to the barber. Clothes, no problem; pants and a top. However, little boys talk a lot more than little girls in my experience. That I am used to. My nephew was a talker. He's not so much now that he's a full fledged teenager!!!

Seriously, I would be happy with whatever gender I am blessed with. They will get my full unconditional love and that comes with discipline, lol. I don't believe the child is your best friend crap. Your child is your child. They must have boundaries and discipline in order for them to become productive adults.

I know I'll get the children question as time goes by. I'll just refer them to this post, lol.

Friday, May 28, 2010


It's amazing how you meet people and form bonds. Sometimes it's just for a situation and it ends once the situation is over. Sometimes it lasts.

I play this game called Final Fantasy XI. It's a game you get to play with people all over the world. I love the game. I even keep a blog just for it. However, you meet people on there. There've people who've met on there and got married in real life. Some find it taboo to even
talk to people from the game outside the game. But people are people. Whether you talk to them thru the game, on instant messenger, on the telephone or in person.

I am a social woman, if I really got along with you in the game, I'll talk to you outside of the game. I have went to the movie with one person I met from the game. Talk to a few on instant messenger and one person on the phone. I like to get to know people. I just don't like the game playing of dating. But that's a different story for a different post.

Why this post? Well I want to express finding gems from the least likely places. I started building a friendship with a guy I met on FFXI. We started off on Instant messenger and now we communicate by messenger or telephone. Occassionally we've mailed stuff to each other
too. I speak to him every day. When I started talking to him, he was married. I knew that from the game. I was not trying to break up a marriage or anything. He is a genuinely nice guy to me. So why should I not be friends with him. Just because he's married doesn't make him
off limits to friendships. I know he was going thru a rough spot with his relationship, but the most part we didn't discuss it unless it was weighing on his mind and wanted to discuss it. I may at times bring it up because I sense something in his speech that something was bothering him.

We've been communicating for nearly 5 months, everyday. So I kind of gotten a feel for how he thinks. He has some strange hobbies but they are not dangerous. We have to expect a bit o strange in everyone. I know I'm strange and hard to figure out to some people. But a lot of
people don't have the patience to figure me out. Yeah I just strayedagain, sorry, back to what I was saying.

It's weird how much I enjoy having conversations with this guy. I feel quite myself and don't feel like I have to live up to any expectations. I don't feel like I have to be on my guard. Mind you, 5
months ago, I just played with him on a game. We talked and had fun on the game. I tend to go on lots of hiatus from the game because of my life patterns. He was in my linkshell one day I came back from a hiatus. And he just seemed like so much fun when in the linkshell. He
was down for whatever!!!!

I found out how much of a genuine person he truly he is this week. He knew that I was having he worst week. I came home on Thursday to find a package from him. I opened it to find a tiger statue.
He knows I love tigers. He said he knew I was having a rough week and he wanted
to make me feel a bit better. I was so happy that I was in near tears. He seriously thought about me and chose something I would like, purchased it with his own money and mailed it to me. I never asked him to. He just wanted to make me feel better. That was unbelievably nice
of him. He has no intention of trying to date me. He was being nice. I want to say his momma and poppa raised him right. They raised a good guy who has some very different quirks. They done very good. I do see that we could be very good friends evem in the future.

Friends come into your lives for a reason. You never know why, but never regret any friendships you make. Even if they fail. They served a purpose in that time of your life.  Treasure what time you do have with them.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Preying on The Innocent

I have been meaning to write this post for some time now. I needed proof of what I was talking about before I discuss it. For the past 10 years that I have been back in NY, there's this doctor's office that
has really gotten a reaction from me everyday.

There are 2 signs hanging on the gates to the property. The first one says her name and number. The second one says "Circumcisions Prevents HIV." That sign makes me react. What kind of stupidity is that. She is
preying on the ignorant and the uneducated. She has went thru countless years of school. She should know how HIV can be passed on.

First, I am the only person in my immediate family who is not in the health field. I have discussed this topic with my family, my personal doctor and various others in the health field. They all agree with me that this doctor is just after money by preying on those who don't know better.

Circumcisions can help you spot a laceration on the head of a penis. That can assist you to decide whether you want to risk having unprotected. It doesn't prevent HIV. Just gives you clearer vision on
the penis.

You can catch HIV from unprotected sex, sharing needles, lacerations, and blood donations. I am going to list each way to get and how to prevent.

Getting HIV from a blood donation in 1st World countries is extremely rare now since they check your blood before you donate. In 3rd world countries it is possible because they do not have resources to screen
blood. If you find yourself in a 3rd world country try not to get into a situation where you need a transfusion. If you do, have yourself flown to a 1st World country. It may be expensive, but would you
rather catch something that will inevitably kill you.

Lacerations, is when one person has a cut and the next person does and somehow the 2 cuts meet. Sometimes people do not know that they have a cut because it's so miniscule. Always, always use gloves if you are helping to tend to a wound on someone.

Never share needles!!! Whether it's for drugs or tattoos. You are giving the virus a direct connection. You can catch more than just HIV!!!

Lastly is having unprotected sex. Don't do it unless you are both tested and 200% sure that your other is not stepping out in the relationship. Always use a condom. If you have a latex allergy, there are condoms that you can use. Unfortunately lambskin condoms doesn't prevent transmission of STDs or HIV. However, the BEST way to prevent HIV is to be "abstinent."

If a doctor tells you that you have to be circumcized to prevent HIV, please run the opposite way. They just want money.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

My Old Leather Jacket

When I graduated college in California I didn't receive any gifts just lots of congratulations. My boyfriend at the time took me to dinner to celebrate but complained the whole night that he should've graduated already. He had one more year after I graduated. He was doing like he normally does, playing the competition game and playing "I should of, could of". The whole night was him complaining.

I got a job right out of college. So my plan was to hurry save up money and pay off my credit card bill because I ran it up very high buying school books. I had moved into my dad and uncle's place for the
time being. I was not planning to stay very long. Have you ever lived with 2 men? It is not fun.

Within 6 to 8 months I was able to pay off my credit card and save enough money to get my own apartment. I was pretty lucky. It was in the next building from my father's. So I was on my way to independence, complete independence. That's when I decided to finally buy myself my graduation present. Some people went on vacations, others bought jewelry, and others buy knick knacks. I wanted a leather coat. I've always wanted one. Especially after seeing my sister with a nice one.

I didn't just want any particular one. I shopped around intensely for one. I found it in Lerners NY, which is now called New York & Co. It was beautiful. It was black. Just made it past my bottom. Had a
belt and 2 pockets at the side. It had simple elegance. I was so happy with my purchase that I hardly wore it. I do that at times. It makes things last longer, lol. I had other jackets and coats to wear. I just
loved looking at it and the fact it was my own.

So by time I moved back to NY in 2001 I started to wear the jacket a bit more. In NY, I wore it regularly in the fall and sometimes in the spring. I was wearing my jacket on 9/11. When I got out of the subway that morning by the World Trade Center, I was covered in soot from the burning building. At that point only one plane had hit. I just made it in time for the see the second plane hit. I'm glad I was late that morning. I was supposed to go into that building. I normally didn't work there. I was picking something up from a customer there. Needless to say, I had to run for my life in my leather jacket and shoes on.

At this point no one was allowed on or off the island of Manhattan. So I had to walk from lower Manhattan all the way to my Godmother's place at W 89th St and Amsterdam. Near the other end of the island. I barely made it. When I hit W 62 St, I could not walk any longer without severe pain. I just sat on a bench. Then a man in a white van stopped and was offering rides up Broadway for $1. It should've been free but beggars can't be chosers.

I got in van and got off at W 89th and crawled on my hands and knees to my godmother's place. She was waiting for me. My jacket full of soot dirtying her clean apartment. She didn't care. She just embraced me as
I walked in. She fed me, I took a shower (more like a bath since I could barely stand) as my clothes were being washed. I ate and went to go to sleep. However, the combination of all the crap I enhaled down
at the WTC, taking off my filthy clothes and my grim reeper, my godmother's cat, I had to be rushed to the ER. There I spent the rest of the night. I wanted to go home though.

In the morning very few trains were leaving Manhattan and I made sure that I was on one of them. Me and my trusty leather jacket. I was still in excruciating pain from walking and trying to breath but I needed to be home.

Since then, me and my jackey has been inseparable. It's my favorite. Last year my mom started to complain about me wearing it. She said it looks like a hobo's jacket. Granted the pockets were no longer pockets, but a hole at the sides. Some color was starting to fade. The lining was intact. Thru the years, the coat has molded itself to fit my body. Like I said, it was my favorite coat. So I ignored my mother and just didn't wear it when she came to visit.

So my mother came up in March and caught me wearing my leather coat. She fussed at me profusely about wearing my coat. She saying how awful it looked. I asked my brother for back up and he agreed with her. The traitor!! I was not going to part with my jacket. I refuse!!!!!

So my mom, my niece and myself had a girls trip to the mall because My niece needed a pair of jeans. My mom drags me into the leather store. It's a store that only sell leather coats, boots and accessories. She
made me try on multiple jackets. I tried on this dark chocolate jacket. It was my style, simple elegance. Nothing so flashy about it. In most lights it looks black. I'm still a bit hesitant to part with my jacket. But this new jacket was really nice. It wouldn't hurt if I had 2. So I decided to buy it. As we were leaving the store, my mom tells me that if I didn't buy it, she would've. Damn it. I could've gotten a free jacket.

When I reached home, my nephew was in my room playing on my PS3. I walked in with my jacket and he says to me, "Wow, a new jacket. Your other one looked like it died!" I was so ready to strangle him. I just
gave him "the look" and he apologized and turned back to his game. I mean everyone was against my jacket. Granted some parts of it lost its color. The black was starting to look a little grey. It was still wearable. Everyone is just jealous!!!!!!

My mother came into my room and said that I should donatr my old leather coat. WTH!!! If I'm not allowed to wear it because it looks like it's dead, why donate it? She said it will come in handy to someone who needs a coat. But why my coat!!!?!!! It was a banter all night until I gave in. I will donate my coat. I hope whomever receives it appreciates it and loves it like I did. Still do. Just typing post is making my eyes tear up.

Here's pics of my old jacket:


Here's pics of my new jacket: