Wednesday, May 28, 2014

R.I.P. Phenomenal Woman!!!

Today we lost a true African-American Hero. Her voice maybe silent for the future but we will continue to have her voice in our heads and hearts.

I've never met her but I respected her immensely. When I hear her voice I stop and listen regardless of what I was doing. I'm not the greatest poet, but the following is my favorite poem. I've had it plastered in front of my desk in many of my offices.


Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,
They say they still can’t see.
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need for my care.
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Maya Angelou, “Phenomenal Woman” from And Still I Rise. Copyright © 1978 by Maya Angelou.

Rest in peace Maya Angelou. You will be missed.

Sunday, May 25, 2014

I'm So Vain, I know This Post is About Me

I'm in the mood to share more about myself. Maybe people can get my personality a bit more or I just want to put it out there. Self therapy in form of voyeurism.

1. I don't do the phone. I love my iPhone. I just don't like talking on the phone. I only speak to very few people on the phone. Everyone else needs to text me or AIM me. Phone calls will go directly to voicemail. Once I listen to it, I will text or email back. In my career, you've learned the phone is NOT your friend.

2. I don't like people wasting my time. Dating was rough for me. I hated dates that led no where. I find it a waste of time. If I make plans with you don't waste my time having me wait 20 to 30 minutes without any explanation. All you do is piss me off and I won't make plans with you again. If I deem that the friendship is worth it, then I'll tell you a different time that way, when you are late, you are on time.

I started this list off with my pet peeves. Sorry, this lends to fact #3. I tend to go negative first then bring in the positive. I rub alcohol in the wound before I put neosporin and bandage it up.

4. I have a very very very over active imagination. You can tell me something and I'll be in my head visualizing it. I also have epic dreams.

5. I like writing. I have 3 stories in my head I would love to get out to the assets but time is my downfall. They need to have an apparatus that can scan your brain and type out what you want. That would make this easier. I have been published though. I participated in an anthology with my GoodReads group. The book can be gotten here.

6. Restaurant/Cafe hopping. I love trying new restaurants. As a kid, I dreamt that I would live in Manhattan and I would eat dinner at different caf├ęs/restaurants every night. If that were true, I'd weigh a ton. Which brings me to the next point.

7. I hate exercising. I find it tedious and boring. I don't like repetitive boring things. Ugh. But alas I do it to be healthy.

8. I judge people immediately on first look. My mom always said to make your first impression your best impression so you must always look presentable. I used to hate that. How can people just judge you like that? It was unfair. I used to throw back, well never judge a book by its cover. She acknowledged it but countered that society does not work that way. They already have a prejudice to you already because you are Black. Don't give them anymore reasons to not like and respect you. So I made sure I looked presentable in the most important times. But, yeah, I will judge every single hoodrat looking guy walking on the street, hanging out at a street corner, on the train or anywhere. Race does not come into play here even though majority of the hoodrat looking guys are Black. I will not give them a positive acknowledgement. If they want me to give them positive, they must look positive. I will not talk to or hire a guy who can't wear his pants how it's made to. If not, they are a bunch if delinquents. I don't lie down with dogs because I don't want folks thinking I have fleas. I've heard the "self expression" excuse numerous times. How's it self expression when all your slummy pals are wearing the same look? Come on. Black men want to be respected by society and not stereotyped as thugs. Well do something about it!! Stop looking like one!!!!

9. I would love to live by the beach. I am a beach bum. Everyday and all day I'd lay outside on the beach relaxing and reading a book. Now that's what I call heaven. I need a beach STAT.

10. I think I my body gets depressed. There are a day or two close to my period, but not every period, (eww yucky, whatever, grow up) that I want to do things but my body absolutely won't budge. It's like my body has its own entity with its own will. Won't listen to my brain at all. But it will compromise on bodily functions such as breathing, using the bathroom. As of late these days are becoming rare.

11. I love sleeping. It is so good. I'd rather take a nap everyday but work won't permit it. Sleep is therapeutic for me.

Well I think this is enough sharing for today. There may be another fact sharing post in my future. There's so much to learn about me.

Friday, May 23, 2014

I'm Tired

I'm tired. What am I tired of? This post is me letting iff some steam. If you can't handle negativity, then this post is not for you. I need to vent and this is my forum to do so.

I'm tired of the degenerates, street trash, hoodrats, jackasses that hang out at the corner of blocks (ones that have a bodega on them). I'm tired of the folks who condone their behavior. I'm tired of the people who created this issue in the first place. I'm tired having to avoid people just to get home. I wish I had the power of judge and jury because I would send everyone of them to death row. I'm tired of being harassed by them because I refuse to acknowledge them. Why do I have to acknowledge street trash? Find someone else to peddle your illegal wares.

I'm tired of bosses who don't know how to talk to people appropriately. I'm tired of busting my ass without fair pay. I'm tired having to take shit from assholes. I'm tired having to chase people to make a decision when they want to be the person to make the decision. I'm tired of people taking my silence as ignorance. I'm very aware of what's going on around me. I just CHOOSE not to say anything until I'm fed up. I am not taking responsibility for anyone's incompetence.

I'm tired of bullshit over interracial relationships. I'm tired of people asking me if my husband is a freak as if White men all have wierd fetishes. I'm tired if Black men thinking that I'm not satisfied by my husband because he's White. I'm tired of Black men think they have the gal to try to step to me the minute my husband moves away. I have no interest in you. I'm FUCKING HAPPILY MARRIED! I'm tired of Black women asking me why I didn't marry a Black man. Seriously? Why can't I date and marry whom I love? I've dated tons of Black men. They weren't the one who captured my heart. I have very little patience for bullshit. Sorry, a lot of Black men like to bullshit. I've dated Latin men to. Same story. I've also dated White men. Same story. Dating men in General has a lot of bullshit that I don't have patience for. I'm tired of people telling me that my marriage won't last because we come from 2 different worlds. Fuck you!! I want all these negative nelly's to get the hell away from me before I give them a once more.

If you read this post. I'm sorry for the negativity and vulgarity. I just had it up to here (imagine my hand above waving above my head). Thank you tho for listening (reading).

Friday, May 9, 2014

Chris Dates a Black Girl

Sunday night I was watching a new Episode of Family Guy on Fox. It was a very thought provoking episode, hence this blog post. In this episode, Chris starts dating Jerome's daughter. If you don't know Family Guy, Chris is a White Kid and Jerome is Black which makes his daughter Black.

I'm all for interracial couples, especially ones that matches my own relationship. So I am going to briefly summarize this episode with commentary in italics.

Jerome's daughter started going to Chris' school. He meets her, talks to her, falls for her. *Chris is actually seeing her for herself not her skin color.* He brings her home to meet his family. The first thing is Peter says is he wants to see Chris in the kitchen. *I was preparing to be pissed off now.*
Peter says he thought Chris would bring home hugely fat woman. Then it cuts to a scene where Peter is directing a huge women to back up into a garage. *The fat woman issue will be another post, but what I loved about Peter's reaction is that he saw nothing wrong with this relationship.* Peter then rushes them both back into the living room because Lois maybe listing off all the Black people she knew. *I don't find this part racist. Lois is ignorant.*
After the visit, Peter, Chris and his girl go to the Clam which Jerome owns. Jerome forbids Chris & his daughter to date. It upsets Chris, his daughter and even Peter. *Why is Jerome so mad about this? Is it because it's Chris or is it his race?*Chris and his girlfriend run away to be together. Now Peter and Jerome are looking for the kids. Jerome tells Peter all the hardships of being Black and experiences some of the racisms Blacks have to endure on a regular basis. *Being a stupid person, Peter actually gets it. * They find Chris and daughter in a hotel room in bed. All they were doing was kissing. Jerome tells her that no daughter of his is dating a White Guy is plain disrespectful! Peter then asks how he felt about a Black guy dating a White woman. Jerome says that 'glorious heaven'. *Seriously? I'm pissed now. It's disrespectful for a Black girl to date White but okay for Black guy to date White? How dare Seth McFarlan agree with stupid ignorant Black folks on this topic. Is he racist himself?* Peter then tells Chris in a long drawn out over the top explanation that they had to respect Jerome's stupid wishes and that Whites need to only date Whites and never should races mix. Then Jerome's daughter asks him is this the lesson he wants her to learn. Jerome sees the error of his ignorant thinking and apologizes. *Hallelujah McFarlan saved his ass right there. I so was going to light up message boards, his Facebook page his twitter feed. The works.* So Chris and his girl gets to stay together. *I hope to see this relationship blossom on the show, but I'm sure it was just for an episode.*

This episode was a good one. Family Guy usually exasperates stereotypes to the fullest no matter of race or religion. But this episode by the end I think was a good episode, pushing BW/WM relationships as a normal in society's eyes. I hope to see more shows focus on positive looks and relationships for BW/WM.

Thursday, May 1, 2014

20 Facts About Me

My HS friend Dionne is doing a blog challenge for 100 days. In last night's post she did 20 Facts About Me. So I decided to try it. This may be a daunting task since I am pretty quiet about myself. I'd rather sing the praises of others like Dionne. I admire her tenacity. So here is my attempt.

1. Was born in Brooklyn NY
2. I'm a middle child. I have an older sister and a younger brother.
3. I am currently married. If you knew me in my 20s and younger, you'd know that this is out of character for me. However, marriage seems to suit me.
4. I am highly sensitive. I don't act like it when you meet me. I internalize things and get bent out of shape in my head or when I'm by myself.
5. I don't like to share a lot. This is an admission I never really told people. Being a middle child you got hand me downs and then had to had down again. I never really got to keep much for myself. Hence, why I don't like to share. But, over the years I have gotten better at sharing.
6. I take care of others better than myself. I am currently trying to take care of myself more.
7. I am stubborn. I will admit that. I'm set in my ways. I get it from my parents.
8. I don't like to be rushed. I will slow down even worse just to spite you.
9. I don't like anyone in my personal space. I get very irritated if someone's in it. Why do I live in NYC?
10. I love curling up with a good book. You can find me in a corner, curled up with my iPad.
11. I like playing video games even though lately it's been regulated to my iPhone only.
12. My favorite and spirit animal is the Tiger. Can't you tell from my blog's name? My aim name? My email address?
13. I am an accountant by trade. But I'm so much more.
14. I've lived in California for 8 years. I hated living there when I was there, but now I kind of miss it.
15. I don't take rejection well. But I do use it as strength to prove you wrong.
16. There are days where I just want to be in my own world. Don't want anyone talking to me. Just me, the couch and my thoughts.
17. I have OCD when it comes to papers. I don't like other people writing on my documents. It bothers me to no end.
18. I HATE the cold weather. Give me 80 degrees & more any time. I can also do without the humidity.
19. I'm a gadget-aholic. I love gadgets.
20. I so want to be a vampire!! I don't want to die. I want to live forever. I think I would be a good vampire. I'd just feed off of the wicked & leave the innocent alone. In this world, I wouldn't starve.

Do you think you can list 20 things about yourself?