Monday, April 4, 2016

Death In The Family: Part Tres

This past weekend we went to my cousin M's funeral. He was 1 year older than me. Makes me think about my life. This my 3rd, 1st cousin to pass away. None of my aunts or uncles have passed but my generation is dying off. It is heartbreaking.

As you know funerals tend to be family gatherings. We tend to see relatives we normally don't see. Four out of my mom's 6 siblings came and some of their children. Like all family gatherings there's going to be drama. I expected drama. This was also a chance to introduce hubby to my mom's side of the family. He only met one cousin and one Aunt.

The drama for me was brought on by my Uncle. I haven't seen him since my cousin A's funeral. At A's funeral my Uncle had a tizzy about how the 2nd and 3rd cousins don't respect him and such. To be honest, a good chunk of the 2nd and 3rd cousins didn't even know who he was. It's not like he was around for them to get to know him. At M's funeral. I was talking to my cousin Md, introducing hubby to her and giving her our condolences. I saw my Uncle. So here how things unfolded.

Me: Hey Uncle D
Uncle D: You have an uncle?
I hug him.
Uncle D: Now, you have an uncle?
Me: Well I tried to keep in touch with you but you never responded.
Uncle D: Really
Me: I emailed you. That's the only contact info I have for you.
Uncle D: (flailing his arms) I don't do no technology crap.
Me: so how about we exchange info at end of the funeral. (Pulling my hubby close) By the way, let me introduce you to my husband.
They shook hands cordially and my uncle ran off. I didn't even see him at the end of the funeral. We did not go to the Repass (where food is served and you get to socialize) afterward.

All this happened within earshot of my mother, brother and husband. It truly irritated the shit out of me after the funeral. He was so rude and the misery coming off of his words was palpable. He was not joking or being sarcastic. My mom mentioned in car ride home that he was was mad that he didn't get invited to my wedding. None of my aunts and uncles were invited to my wedding (both sides of my family). If that was the true reason, he needs to get over it. I, however, don't think that's the case. I don't even want to bother with him any longer. He is there in title only and not relationship. I don't know I let this bother me so much to write this, but it did.

Later that night my hubby asked if my Uncle was just being sarcastic when he was talking to me. I said nope he was being rude. He was a bit shocked at the behavior. That's just my family's behavior. This drama didn't make a solemn situation any better.

Everyone's family is far from perfect. It's how you deal with them that makes you who you are.

So folks I just want to end this rant with some positivity. Treat those around you as you want to be treated. And live your life as happily and freely as you wish because you are not guaranteed tomorrow.

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