Sunday, August 19, 2007
I am an avid manga reader so I do have to go into comic shops in order to purchase them. Ever walk into one? It's a sacrifice I make every other month. The places smell of bad body odor. They are always packed with those men, as stated above, who lack hygiene or just funky. I have been to comic conventions too. The smaller ones have the same smell as the comic shops, but more potent because you have 10 times more of these men there. The only place that I do get relief is at the large NY Comic Con. I don't think the men can make the whole Javitz Center smell.
Since I go to the places would make you think about mine. I am a woman who is very conscience about hygiene. I make sure I bathe, lotion, and put on my deodorant. Haven't these guys thought of that? I know 3 men who are avid collectors, but I'm going to talk about one. He always had a weird odor about him. I know that he showered. But the odor was still there.
I wonder if the comics soak into their skin and oozes out of their pores giving the odor. I really don't know. I know most of these men go home and read comic books all night. They don't really try to date much because it takes them away from their reading and collecting. God forbid a woman comes by and touches their "mint condition rare #1 Spiderman " comic. That would be a disaster. Plus spending money on dates will cut out of the money used to buy more books. Now, let's not talk about intimacy.
All I'm trying to say, is comic collectors need to take a break from reading comics and pay attention to their appearance and hygiene.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
The 2 people we had to lay off today were 2 people I really liked. I didn't want to see them go. They did their job well. Well at least to me. However, they say it was a dept restructuring. It was hard for me to sit in there and give them their termination paperwork. I was literally shaking. It was a difficult. I was holding back tears. I just wanted to say "sike".
I have never really felt so bad laying off someone before. I have laid off 30 people in 1 day before. And I have fired people before. But none of those ever made me feel like crying. Yes I wanted to cry. But I was a big girl, I didn't. Am I getting sensitive in my old age? Am I cut out to be in my position? I know people will tell me to buck up & let it roll off. That's easier said than done. I have always been sensitive.
However, there is 1 girl at my job that needs to be let go NOW. Why hasn't she been sacked? I think her boss and others are scared of her. I'm actually a bit apprehensive about her myself. I call her "Columbine Girl". She's the quiet, paranoid, vindictive girl you don't want to meet. But she's still there. What can I do? This is corporate America for you.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
I was telling him that I am looking quite unattractive right about now because I finished taking out my braids. I wished I didn't have to work tomorrow. Now he was telling me that I probably still looked good. I laughed in his ear. Then he went on to tell me, that I would look good whether my hair was braided or not and that I would look good with or without clothes on. Then I definitely laughed louder. I told him he needs to keep his mind out of the gutter. He got offended. He said he meant whether I was dressed up or not. I of course gave him my signature "mm hmm". Then he complained that I didn't know how to take a compliment. Then I said he was just trying to charm me. He then said I should learn how to take a compliment.
This made me think. I've been told that before. I don't take compliments well. I never believe them. I never know who's sincere. I don't find myself to be gorgeous. I think I'm ok. I do get my share of attention. However, most times people compliment me, it's because they want something from me. I rarely get genuine compliments.
What would it take for me to believe compliments? I believe consistency without the person asking for something in return. I know that might create a monster. But I really don't know how to overcome my issue with compliments. I will give big surprise to anyone who can give me any advice on how I can start to believe in compliments.
Monday, August 13, 2007
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Why do I do this to myself?!?!?! I get back in touch with a great guy & I totally ruin any it for any long term anything. I am such an idiot.
Our movie outing on Friday was great. First we bought the tickets to the movie. Then we went somewhere to eat. After the movie we went to a pool hall. Then we came back to my place. There wasn’t a silent moment between us. The only time we were silent, was in the movie theater. We had a good time. We talked nonstop. I really enjoyed spending time with him. We picked up where we left off.
He discussed his issue with his wife. We discussed what has happened to him & what has happened to me. We discussed my best friend and her changes. We discussed everything under the sun. We flirted. We ate. We didn’t dance. However, he agreed to come with me to a wedding on the 25th and then to the beach on the 26th.
He spent the night with me for the first time ever. He’s not a bad sleeper. I could get used to it. The next morning, we woke up. I actually cooked him breakfast. After breakfast, we were talking when the people to deliver my new dryer came. He was a great help to me when they were installing.
Everything was going well. When the dryer was finished being installed, I agreed to walk him to the subway station. That’s when I messed up. As we were leaving, I told him he’s free to come here if he feels he needs to get away. He said thanks. Then I opened my big mouth and offered him a key. I do not know how or why that came out of my mouth. He was nice enough to say no thank you. I really don’t know where that came from. I think my emotions over powered me. I am so stupid.
The walk to the subway was full of conversation. The walk went by too fast. I think my head is moving too fast. Maybe I should just back off. Let things be. He has enough to go through. He doesn’t need me complicating things. I will enjoy the time we have together.
I don’t usually allow men to get under my skin. I normally have to put a wall because I get hurt so easily. I think I may put too much on things. I am just not used to too many good things happening to me.
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
Sunday night, I was home ironing some clothes. As I was ironing, I began to reminisce about those who I have met in my past and truely enjoyed being around. I thought about him. I wondered how he was doing and such. I thought about how we met, what we have done, my feelings that I had for him, and why we lost touch.
I met him at a club in NYC called Webster's Hall. He out of the blue asked me to dance. We danced for the rest of the night. We exchanged numbers, but I never called him. I had a boyfriend at the time. Neither did he. Four months later, I went to another club called Ivy. After the whack music stopped playing, my girl and I were on the dance floor partying up a storm. Low and behold, this guy start dancing with me. I turned to see who it was, the guy looked familiar. I asked him his name as we danced. When he told me I exclaimed that we had met before. He looked shocked then looked at me again. That night we exchanged numbers again. This time he called. We were nearly inseparable. He was dating some chick but we still hung out, then I started dating someone else. But we still hung out. I felt so at ease with him. I did like him, but our ships never crossed in that sense. We both were involved with other people when either of us were available. After a while, we both changed jobs. That's how we lost contact. We changed jobs and lost contact. However, before we lost contact, he had gotten married and had a baby girl.
Since Monday, when he contacted me, we've been IM'n all day at work. We made plans to see Bourne Ultimatum on Friday. We have also planned a beach trip on August 25th. Now I feel that we are moving too fast. Not that we are dating. It's just that we have not seen each other in so long. I can't fight the fact we got along so well. I miss hanging out with him. I doubt there will be anything more than a friendship with him. He is now getting a divorce. It's a process that I really don't want to be involved in. I just want to rekindle our friendship. Is that so wrong?
Saturday, August 4, 2007
Believe it or not, I was the hesitant fan. I never knew what all the hub bub was about. My godmother read the first book and told me it was great. My best friend was also a big fan. She gave me the first book 2 years after it came out. I believe I read that book in nearly 3 days. Then I borrowed the other 2 books and read them in succession.
JK Rowling was my pusher. Never had an author since I was a kid, w/ Francine Pascal, had me hooked. I have not been that die hard of a fan to sit over night on line to get the books. But I have gotten the book within the first week of release. Book 7 is the first book that I have preordered before the release. I picked the book up on the first day. Now knowing that this is the last book I think I've going thru withdrawal. I finished the book this morning & I've been cranky all day. I have never been so miserable after finish reading a book.
I wonder if Rowling will let people write fan fiction. But no one can do it justice as she can. I can't believe how well she developed her characters' world. It was so believable. I also must commend the directors and casting agents for the movies. They did a brilliant job of making the movies as true to the books as possible.
Well it's time for me to end this rant. Time to find another book to read. I'm one of those book-aholics. It's my therapy to the real world.